Is God Laughing or Crying?
Tragically Humorous or Humorously Tragic
The New/Old Approach to Women Religious
are not to be "Old Maids,"
but instead, "Spiritual Mothers"
attending to all our needs
as did our own Mothers.
A New Impression
We'd like to hire you
to be a spokesperson for the Bishops
to give the public the impression
we don't discriminate against women,
provided you sign our
Oath of Unquestioned Obedience.
They are qualified and may now apply for
to the Vatican's newly established
Female Deaconate Program,
the Church's new Women's Auxillary.
(That should shut 'em up a while.)
An End to Discrimination
We are announcing a New Attitude
towards Women religious;
On Holy Thursday,
we will wash their feet!
Taxation without Representation?
Because we support Equal Rights
for Gays and Lesbians,
We cannot receive Communion,
but he said we can still
make our weekly donations.
Going too Far?
We CANNOT let him close our Bank;
where will we get our interest-free money?
Rein in those nuns!
You don't even look like a Nun!!
Source of Trouble
Females are at the heart of the church's problems,
most especially free-Spirited Nuns.
The Vatican will reign them in.
How Dare They!
The Nuns are simply too close to the people,
don't really represent us
(nor obey us)
We must reign 'em in.
I guess you'll have to cook the Easter meal, Mary.
New Approach to Old Ways
They are making us Give more
so we can truly be
A Church of the Poor.
Sub and Substance
Put away the mitres and limos, guys
(at least for now);
We're trying a new Public Image:
Friends of the Poor.
A Perverse Offering
may have prevented his AIDS/HIV,
but the least we can do
is wash his feet on Holy Thursday.
Why Catholics MUST stop
using Birth Control
Question of the Day
With Pope Francis running the show,
do we sell all our robes and furs
or save 'em the next guy?
Ditch these mitres?
A New Captain
Whom do we elect to take charge?
True Freedom of Religion
Next thing you know,
they'll wanna vote.
No, You may not inform your parishioners
about their rights under Canon Law;
Only about their Obligations.
We cannot afford to have the Sheep
The Role of Women in the Church
Mary obeyed God's Command
to bear Jesus,
a lesson for all women
to be Obedient
to His Representatives.
Good Bye Pants;
I been elected Pope!
Who's the new Pope?
Chi se ne frega?
Non fa differenza.
This is a New Capital Campaign
to try and replace all the monies
they fraudulently took from us
in the first place.
(Still tax deductible)
Get outta Dodge!
Hey, resigning is permitted;
I'm outta here!
Call it Migraines.
The Captain is Resigning . . .
Women and Children First
As there are no women and children aboard
Males can go first.
Yes, it's True
that Change is a sign of Life
in all of Creation,
a sign of Life in the Spirit.
But Church doctrine and dogma
ready the be-all and End-all.
Punishment to fit the Crime.
Yes, he protected abusers for years
thus perpetuating abuse of children;
His penalty: No speaking engagements
. . . in LA.
Next we'll have to get the word
removed from those periodicals
are the keepers of Truth.
Ooops, we lost our crew
A Welcome Back
New Evangelization Campaign